Two kinds of depression
Most of us have at some point or other been through phases of life, when we feel low about our self. It can be a failed exam, an accomplishment that we failed to have, a heartbreak or a long build dissatisfaction with our own life.
Whatever the cause be, when I think about them or learn about a case of depression, I am always able to broadly classify them into two very distinct categories. Category on the basis of the nature of what we failed in or perceive our self as to be failed in.
All through our life, we will find ourself, either giving something or taking something (Although it’s always taking, I’ll keep that for later). Sometimes we work to help others who lack resources and opportunities that we enjoy, or help for a cause that we strongly feel about, or even help ourselves by making a conscious positive change in our lifestyle. At other times, we work to achieve name, fame or a relationship and strive for various ambitions.
Based on the commonly accepted definition of selfishness, we can see that works that involve helping either others or ourselves are less selfish or even selfless (again its almost never selfless, but for a later post) compared to works in which we strive for achievements, relationships or name which are more selfish. Since we may fail in these two kinds of works, a state of depression can be well characterized by how much is the element of self obsession it contains. It may seem to be a spectrum, but common states of depression that people face broadly can be fit in one of the two categories.
Although the work we do might be selfish or selfless, the depression by in large is more on the selfish side. It is the selfishness that is so consumed and contained that we can not even explicitly identify it. We end up thinking that we are a victim of the complex consequences or that we are so unfortunate or incapable and dull. Calling oneself an unfortunate in itself is the result of self reverence as keeping oneself on a higher pedestal than the others and identifying our own hardships and failures as being intense than those of others is nothing but a form of being self subsumed. It also reflects the utter ignorance and apathy towards the population of the entire earth, high percentage of which is not bestowed with the opportunities, comfort, resources and intelligence that we may have. It reflects the arrogance of the self by calling one self unfortunate rather being grateful to the people, to the circumstances, to the nature and the god for the existence of opportunities. We weren’t being grateful because we thought that it was all that we rightly deserved, when only what we seen to do was for ourselves, all the time. Because we were so self obsessed, that we thought we were doing it for others, when we were doing it for ourselves; and hence we demanded the reward. When we didn’t get the reward, the expectation for which were already so high, we got depressed. The depression due to bad relationships, due to bad grades, ill health, getting into unfortunate circumstances, failing to achieve something after trying very hard (or even not trying hard, but thinking that we are supreme), etcetera. All these examples have the commonality that it was something that we expected to get and that we took for granted. Expectations and taking things for granted are themselves the prime characteristics of a self consumed mind and a soul trapped in a shell of ignorance.
The other class of depression that I talked about is the result of our negative tendencies. Tendencies or sanskars are made through our repeated actions. When we fail in doing something as a result of our some negative and unproductive tendencies, that we often seen to have lost control over, we might feel low and hopeless. But one can not say that depression due to a failed endeavor is of this category if one can not identity the negative tendency. This is the state, when we know due to this old habit, bad concentration, or an addiction, we are not able to do what we want. This kind of depression and low feeling is not very dependent on results, but more depends on our own satisfaction with how we are doing what we are doing. On the extreme it can be the people who lost control over whole mind due to drug addiction. The commonality in these is that we are aware of our certain weakness or an ill tendency that we wish to overcome. It can be the case of an ill tempered person, who is in a state of constant dissatisfaction with his life, knowing that everything gets ruined or other people either his family or people at work, have to face a lot due to him due to his short temperdness. Although we cannot say that depressions of these categories is not of selfish nature, but it does not explicitly links to the self obsession as it does in the first category. Though if we think deeply, there is some form of unconscious selfishness in this case too.
Why am I anyways doing this classification? What is the utility behind talking on this dimension? It is the cure! The cure and therapy to come out of this state and the methodology that we use to uplift our loved ones or even ourselves from that low feeling is strikingly different for these two categories. In one it requires to come out of the ignorance shell that we are trapped in, and to see the world outside. In the others it requires the revival of the motivation and energy either from within or without.
The cure of first kind of depression is through making the person more empathetic to the outside world, by making him realize how fortunate he is compared to a vast magnitude of people. Although I should not avoid pointing that this therapy itself partially feeds on selfishness, and self supremacy, but this is a good starting point. Self-supremacy because instead of reviving the empathy of the person for the fellow humans, it may also hinge on the feeling of self supremacy drawn by seeing oneself better than others by keeping oneself in such environment. The more permanent cure is in fact knowledge and realization of the fact that all that we are doing is just for ourselves and not for others; by realizing that we must feel gratitude and reverence for everything that helped us in the process; and by introspecting on various things that we had taken for granted.
The cure of second kind relies on overcoming those ill tendencies. We need to motivate that person to not worry about the result and try his best. This might seem difficult to do but easy to say. But it depends largely how we motivate him. If the cause was a selfless one, making the person realize that by being depressed and not doing anything, he is doing a harm to everyone, (again we do everything for ourselves, but for a later post. In that case the argument will be doing harm to oneself) by not doing duty that he ought to do; therefore he must stop not and do his duty. In the case when the person is struggling from his long standing ill tendency, first we need to realize him to contemplate on the reason behind his depression. “Even though I have a bad tendency, do I qualify to be depressed? The world is paying a heavy price if we are depressed.” Later follows the various measures that we can take to alleviate those ill tendencies. You see asking such questions, reveal the selfishness that is intricately woven in the various states of depression. One must be cautious and not ask these questions if the work, the failure in which caused depression was a not very selfless.
